wastiffia poetica
for the pikers i'll drive the stakes, you steal the power from the place just down the way. freezing by the fire for hours and hours while wishin money had you, play piker songs all night long for me, only for me. our tent is a very, very fine tent with big rats in the yard, life always is so hard, when everything you own sits in a tent, la, la, la... badpoodle MOOSE my TAIL is BLACK my NOSE is BLACK my BALLS is BLACK my ASS is BLACK. can't take BLACK? smell my CRACK (IT'S BLACK). badpoodle run! by gracejones! runrunrunrunrun bite bite chase carry ohmygodcaaaaats evil rats are never fat. gracejones! naps by auntiesofty with wastiff inspiration nap nap napping not much better in life then eating and crapping.. just like a cat in the sun my eyes slowly close and I come undone my head starts to tilt away from the light then falls forward ever so slight till it hits my chest zzzzzzz ZZZZZZZZZ in pure delight. I drool from the left I drool to the right damn I've sprung a leak oh what a disgusting sight.. I awake with a jolt on my key board face down to notice the letters a cross my face make a note with a frown.. thank goodness no one is looking they've all gone to town I think to my self this is my chance as I put on my night gown.. I look at the clock it's a quarter to three as I jump into bed and pull the comforter over meeeeeeeeeeee this is my chance to get a lil more nap just a few more zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz or about forty (thousand) more winks pleaseeeee.. meat by the duchess of armadillo meat meat wonderful meat drips down my chin to land on my feet. how did i ever survive without brisket? my tummy is full, will new mommy miss it? no she gave it to me with pats and with smiles she gives me luvvins and toys in large piles i wonder if this time i'll be here for good i hope so. i'm loving this wonderful food. medica by the duchess of armadillo pills in my cheese, pills in my toast pills in my tummy, i hate those the most good drchristy says i am not healthy doesn't she know i am suddenly wealthy? no bruises no ouchies no wanderings a bed shelter and water and a roof for my head i don't know what i did to be bad i'm glad doG gave me a new mom and dad On Murf's Birffday You don't like me. You don't hafta. But I'm shoutin'-out, To da Great Heahaftah..... Cuz today is your Birffday, MurfMurf ol' friend! An' from such beginnin's, There's never no end. So: HA HA HA HA!!! You thought you was free, From da likes of Bwuno an' Loki an' Meeeee...... But nope - nothin' doin', We'll never forget Our good pal Murf, Who is livin' on yet...... In our minds an' our hearts An' da WastiffList! So HAPPY BIRFFDAY An' don't be pissed....... An' say "Hi" to daKing, An' to all of our Pals, Who left here before us, To find better hals. An' have some BirffdayLint for us, An' say hey to Jimbo, On his bigbluebus, An' Emily, Albert, George an' John..... Oh, I could yammer on an' on............ I always have, an' always will, An' I'll remember you until...... Da Universes all collide, An' TeddyNugent drinks cyanide, An' no more sadness generally, An' I hope you'll still be Pals with MEEEE!!!! HappyBirffdayMurfMurf!!! Ayuh. Ozzy Rules - Amen. Ruv, Your Pal, Keeper (an' Samson!) ladywastiff by smurf en hoffer the lady wastiff from nantucket whose cooter oozed ooze by the bucket, she screamed, in her heat, "please give me some meat!" nay, madam, i'd rather you sucked it. my weiner by smurf en hoffer behold the murf murf's weiner, and be holdin' it, you neener. proudly it dangles with its balls that jangle, a jismic pearl in a neat little swirl, precedes the next stream of urine.