frequently asked questions
regarding erts

Q. what is an ert?
A. an evil rat terrorist of the norfolk variety. other types of terrorists have badness to them, such as the cairn (pretty bad terrorist), skye (not good terrorist) and yorkie (insignificantly bad terrorist), but only the norfolk possesses the essence of concentrated core badness that is evil.

Q. hey, you're not a 'folk; your ears don't curl.
A. bite me. i most certainly am a 'folk with superior ears resistant to mutative genetic defects. vertically inclined ears lend themselves to various "cute ears" machinations, an absolute Must for keeping twoleggeds in line. compare the cuteness factors below.

Q. did your mother have folded over ears?
A. yeah. so did my father. i'm cuter.

Q. so actual norfolk terriers have ears like your parents?
A. get over the ear thing. if you wanna obsess over folds, go to the actual norfolk terrier site

Q. sorry. what do erts eat?
A. balsa. erts LOVE yummy balsa, especially balsa rocket pieces. erts also enjoy delicious tidbits selected from wastebaskets, the room with the plumbing offering the most piquant delectibles. kitty rochas are scrumptious if you can get past the gate guarding the box in which twoleggeds collect them.

Q. do erts eat tomatoes?
A. no.

Q. do erts housepoop?
A. no.

Q. what about that ert-sized extrusion in the corner?
A. it wasn't me.

Q. is an evil rat terrorist more evil than a badpoodle?
A. poodles aren't dogs.

Q. what's with those "things" on badpoodle?
A. an atrocity. erts don't do pompoms.

sad, isn't it?

Q. do erts enjoy being tossed in the air?
A. the hairy twolegged seems to think so.

Q. why did you insert your head into the lady mastiff's naughty bits?
A. because they were there.

Q. why did the ert cross the road?
A. see above.